In a fit of hormonal hysteria, Juicy History was dragged to the movie "Twilight" last week, by her (almost) 13 year-old daughter.

The ordeal was, apparently (see below), intriguing, so...we are pleased
to present:
The History of
"Female Hysteria"
The phenomenon
of Stephenie Meyer's "Twilight", a teen romance novel, now a record-breaking movie, seems to have rendered teenage girls hysterical.
The current object of the hysteria is British actor Robert Pattinson, who plays an alluring teenage Vampire, the lead character in the movie. To date, Mr. Pattinson seems to be handling the "fanpire-mania" with a wide-eyed humility. 
The books became popular as they were read by both Mother's and
Daughter's...and being that the children were gone for Thanksgiving, the books already in the
house, we thought, why not.
Research Findings:
"Twilight" (book 1) and the movie have a steamy, suck-you-into-it type of appeal.
A handsome and sensitive young Vampire filled with inner angst, falls in love with a girl who isn't afraid of him.
Lots of yearning & lusting, no sex (the two species don't mesh that way) and more yearning and lusting.

Reading all four books over Thanksgiving, kept me busy and from buying cat food, for which I tried to remedy by mixing dog
food with a can of salmon that I've had in my cupboard since my Atkins eating ex-husband last stayed over, (the cats were not pleased with my concoction.)
By
the middle of the last book - I felt awkwardness in reading some of Meyer's writing, but, all in all, if she's got
25 million teens with their noses in four-500 to 800 page books, does it matter if it's not going to win the
Pulitzer? I like that she came up with the idea in a dream and had it rejected 14 times before it was published!

I will probably read book 5, "Midnight Sun" when it comes out. (When I can pry it
out of the hands of my not-so-little one.)
Melissa Rosenberg did a really great job of adapting the book to a movie
and Catherine Hardwicke as director also did a nice job.

Women as author, screenwriter and director - powerful inspiration for young ones.
NOTE:
As far as LDS influence, since I read the entire series of books, I can say, I saw none, quite the opposite in fact.

Although Mormon's have a law of chastity, prohibiting pre-martial sex, that some say is reflected in "Twilight", this law also prohibits
masturbation, thoughts of lust and sexual fantasy.

Clearly not the mission of this book.
* Seems as if she just wrote a book - no motives.
The History of Female Hysteria:
Before the vampiric allure of Robert Pattinson:
Female Hysteria hit Leonardo DiCaprio like the massive iceberg that sunk the Titanic, about which a blockbuster movie was made, he the star and in 1997 the total, unequivocal
focus of teenage hysteria, world-wide.
Dubbed Leo-mania,
this hysteria left poor Mr. DiCaprio lacking in any freedom whatsoever. Fans bought every news printed on him, the photographers price on his head grew
to astounding rates. He lived in a fishbowl for a number of years.
He seems
to have willingly given the "heartthrob" hat to anyone who will take it.
There
were others:
Tom Cruise, Michael Jackson, David Cassidy, Donny Osmond, The Beatles....
Tracing Female Hysteria
of the 20th century to its roots, we find:
Elvis Presley.
Why and How - Background:
Growing up an only child, extremely poor, with an alcoholic father and compulsively religious and hovering mother, Elvis Presley displayed early evidence
of musical ability.

He played musical instruments, guitar and piano, with no formal training and although never
learning how to read music, he was able to play a song after hearing it once. Not only did he have an ear for music,
but he could carry a tune and had an exceptional voice from early on, winning a singing contest at 5 years old.
Moving to Memphis at 12 was a critical turning point in the boys life, and greatly influenced the direction of his music. He
would listen to country music on the radio, attend different church services with his mother, sometimes more than one a day
and predominantly African American with gospel choirs, and lastly he was enthralled by the Rhythm and Blues that he would hear played near his home on Beale Street.
At 17 he went to a local studio to record a song and was asked who he sounded like,
he replied: "I don't sound like nobody."
In reality he didn't, it was the 1950's,
Gospel, Country and Rhythm & Blues had never been combined. The country was in a state of segregation and racial
lines were clearly drawn, even in music.
Elvis recorded Arthur Crudup's "That's alright Mama" a Rhythm & Blues song.
The style and manner that Elvis sang and played the song was very different than Crudup's original version. The record went to number one, ushering
in an entirely new style of music with no known classification, first called "Rock-a-billy" then later "Rock-n-Roll."
NOTE: Some really amazing musical examples of his variation in style, "I got a woman"
went from This-to This and "Hound Dog" went from This-to-This (Big Mama Thornton kicks ass!)
With Jim Crow laws "separate but equal" still in effect Elvis Presley was sailing in unchartered waters.

When Elvis began to do live performances, a virtual frenzy began
In addition to singing a totally new type of music, Elvis had an on-stage persona,
a sensual way of singing and overly sexual manner of dancing and moving to his music that sent teenage girls into hysterics, some fainting, some crying, and all screaming.
Many adults of the
generation were horrified at what they considered inappropriate and overtly sexual behavior.

Elvis was vilified by the press and outraged parents, all ignored by the millions of adoring teenagers
who were oblivious to anything but how they loved his music.
Female Hysteria in the Victorian Era:
In the Victorian age, Female Hysteria was accepted as a common medical condition, to which
women were thought more susceptible.
There were many
weird and wild treatments to this "disorder." The most interesting of them being "pelvic massage" a treatment
which would be conducted by a physician. 
NOTE: Because of the time involved in a manual "pelvic massage" the
task could sometimes be tedious and time consuming for physicians, a new medical device, called a "vibrator" was
used to speed up the treatment applications!

Female Hysteria & the Puritans:
The strict Puritan environment of the 17thcentury Massachusetts is thought to have led some teenage girls of the time into fits of hysteria.
These fits were found (after a trial by jury) to come from the practice of Witchcraft, a capital offence, and punishable by death.
Hysteria - Early Roman Times:
Galen, a prominent Roman physician to the Gladiators, practiced under the belief that female hysteria
was caused by sexual deprivation, the prescription being intercourse, if the patient was married and manual stimulation (by
mid-wife) if the patient was single.

Well...doesn't it all make sense now!
Quick Letter to Rob Pattinson:

Dear Rob,
Congratulations on your success, your portrayal of a handsome vampire has left us all hot and bothered.
I've done my best to explain the phenomenon of Female Hysteria, I really do hope it helps.
I feel I must apologize for the baby handed to you from a crowd, by
the mother who wanted you to bite him! And the Hollywood horribles insisting that you straighten your teeth before making the movie (American hang-up.)
Since you have already signed on for the Twilight sequels, I believe that your recent talk show
boasts of "poor personal hygiene" and claims to not wash your coveted wavy locks for "weeks" on end,
is a protective ruse, to send the screaming hordes elsewhere.
Your secret is safe with us.
Yours,
Juicy History
Ps - Not to harp - but please, please tell us that it is really product in your hair ~ Juicy History is reminded of some overly pungent Civil War reenactors craving realism by not bathing for weeks-Ugh! Again - I know it's an American hang-up, but for the love of Christ WASH YOUR HAIR!